Joseph Andrews, Vol. 2 Read online

  CHAPTER XV.

  _An adventure, the consequence of a new instance which parson Adams gaveof his forgetfulness._

  When he came back to the inn he found Joseph and Fanny sitting together.They were so far from thinking his absence long, as he had feared theywould, that they never once missed or thought of him. Indeed, I havebeen often assured by both, that they spent these hours in a mostdelightful conversation; but, as I never could prevail on either torelate it, so I cannot communicate it to the reader.

  Adams acquainted the lovers with the ill success of his enterprize. Theywere all greatly confounded, none being able to propose any method ofdeparting, till Joseph at last advised calling in the hostess, anddesiring her to trust them; which Fanny said she despaired of her doing,as she was one of the sourest-faced women she had ever beheld.

  But she was agreeably disappointed; for the hostess was no sooner askedthe question than she readily agreed; and, with a curtsy and smile,wished them a good journey. However, lest Fanny's skill in physiognomyshould be called in question, we will venture to assign one reasonwhich might probably incline her to this confidence and good-humour.When Adams said he was going to visit his brother, he had unwittinglyimposed on Joseph and Fanny, who both believed he had meant his naturalbrother, and not his brother in divinity, and had so informed thehostess, on her enquiry after him. Now Mr Trulliber had, by hisprofessions of piety, by his gravity, austerity, reserve, and theopinion of his great wealth, so great an authority in his parish, thatthey all lived in the utmost fear and apprehension of him. It wastherefore no wonder that the hostess, who knew it was in his optionwhether she should ever sell another mug of drink, did not dare toaffront his supposed brother by denying him credit.

  They were now just on their departure when Adams recollected he had lefthis greatcoat and hat at Mr Trulliber's. As he was not desirous ofrenewing his visit, the hostess herself, having no servant at home,offered to fetch it.

  This was an unfortunate expedient; for the hostess was soon undeceivedin the opinion she had entertained of Adams, whom Trulliber abused inthe grossest terms, especially when he heard he had had the assurance topretend to be his near relation.

  At her return, therefore, she entirely changed her note. She said,"Folks might be ashamed of travelling about, and pretending to be whatthey were not. That taxes were high, and for her part she was obliged topay for what she had; she could not therefore possibly, nor would she,trust anybody; no, not her own father. That money was never scarcer, andshe wanted to make up a sum. That she expected, therefore, they shouldpay their reckoning before they left the house."

  Adams was now greatly perplexed; but, as he knew that he could easilyhave borrowed such a sum in his own parish, and as he knew he would havelent it himself to any mortal in distress, so he took fresh courage, andsallied out all round the parish, but to no purpose; he returned aspennyless as he went, groaning and lamenting that it was possible, in acountry professing Christianity, for a wretch to starve in the midst ofhis fellow-creatures who abounded.

  Whilst he was gone, the hostess, who stayed as a sort of guard withJoseph and Fanny, entertained them with the goodness of parsonTrulliber. And, indeed, he had not only a very good character as toother qualities in the neighbourhood, but was reputed a man of greatcharity; for, though he never gave a farthing, he had always that wordin his mouth.

  Adams was no sooner returned the second time than the storm grewexceedingly high, the hostess declaring, among other things, that, ifthey offered to stir without paying her, she would soon overtake themwith a warrant.

  Plato and Aristotle, or somebody else, hath said, _that when the mostexquisite cunning fails, chance often hits the mark, and that by meansthe least expected_. Virgil expresses this very boldly:--

  _Turne, quod optanti divum promittere nemo Auderet, volvenda dies, en! attulit ultro._

  I would quote more great men if I could; but my memory not permittingme, I will proceed to exemplify these observations by the followinginstance:--

  There chanced (for Adams had not cunning enough to contrive it) to be atthat time in the alehouse a fellow who had been formerly a drummer in anIrish regiment, and now travelled the country as a pedlar. This man,having attentively listened to the discourse of the hostess, at lasttook Adams aside, and asked him what the sum was for which they weredetained. As soon as he was informed, he sighed, and said, "He was sorryit was so much; for that he had no more than six shillings and sixpencein his pocket, which he would lend them with all his heart." Adams gavea caper, and cry'd out, "It would do; for that he had sixpence himself."And thus these poor people, who could not engage the compassion ofriches and piety, were at length delivered out of their distress by thecharity of a poor pedlar.

  I shall refer it to my reader to make what observations he pleases onthis incident: it is sufficient for me to inform him that, after Adamsand his companions had returned him a thousand thanks, and told himwhere he might call to be repaid, they all sallied out of the housewithout any compliments from their hostess, or indeed without paying herany; Adams declaring he would take particular care never to call thereagain; and she on her side assuring them she wanted no such guests.